With My By Myself

Doing things usually done with others while alone is exhilaratingly disarming. Being unprotected by the company of another human leaves me to just my own senses and thoughts, making for a more keenly aware experience of the ordinary. The first time I recall being metacognitive of this feeling was when I was maybe 9 years old. I was staying at a high-rise condo with a balcony facing some palm trees at Myrtle Beach with my family. I sat in a plastic adirondack chair on the balcony by myself one night and felt very moved within my 9 year old spirit by the sea breeze, the stars, and my aloneness. My cousin came out to sit with me after a little while and tried to talk to me. I distinctly remember telling her, “Keep the peace.” The entire vignette is crystalized in my mind and makes me laugh at myself. It’s fun for me to retrace that root and know that I was who I am, even at 9 years old.

I’ve recently been able to do some neat things alone.

Reid State Park

On certain days, it is essential to be at a beach. The day after the highly successful youth service day I was part of planning, I majorly slept in to recuperate, but needed to be on a beach. I eventually left my house around 2:45 to go to Reid State Park. I knew it was a late start, but the sun stays out late and I decided I could either use my time to do something good for my soul or to watch Netflix. I stayed until sundown and it was so beautiful that it made me sad because I knew it was not mine.

Lewiston by Bicycle

In AmeriCorps State/National, your full time job is to do 1700 hours of direct service during your given term. It boils down to 35-40 hours a week. I thought I needed to exit my term early for another job, which would cause me to lose 8 full work days. To account for the loss, I started grabbing every extra volunteer opportunity possible this summer, and now my hours are stacked so that I only have to work 30 hours a week; 3 day weekends for the rest of my time here! YAY!

I used my first free Monday for a long, peaceful bike ride through the more rural area of Lewiston all the way out to Greene, the next town over. I ended up biking 19 miles that day. There were wild flowers everywhere, so I felt just like the Lupine Lady. The Lupine Lady comes from a book I absolutely loved in 2nd grade about a woman with curly hair who rode her bike through the hills of Maine while scattering lupine seeds. I had such a sense of kinship with my 7 year old self, like I was granting her the wish to be the Lupine Lady.

 

 Pizza Porch

Even now, I am alone, sitting at 84 Court, a delicious pizza restaurant with a charming and sort-of hidden back patio, treating myself to pizza and the pleasure of my company.

Lovely little bistro, n'est pas?

 Oh, and to explain the title of this post:

http://www.hulu.com/watch/37752

Enjoying a lovely summer day and wishing you the same,

JB